Happy new year!

I know I am five minutes early but by the time you check this comic it'll probably already be new years eve so I'm still correct!
This year I don't really have any resolutions because I never really manage to keep up with them, I mean, I did lose weight this year but I gained it again the last few months and love? I love this comic!
I guess I HAVE fulfilled my resolutions.

-adios,D.

In time!

I deeeeed it.

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE

I fucking love christmas and foodisalmostreadysoIgottahurrykthxbye!

-adios,D.

P.S.: Have a wonderful holidays everyone even if there's nothing you celebrate just celebrate living!

Secret santa

I've always kind of liked the idea of secret santa and I haven't really been let down by it but there is always this fear inside of my heart that someone will just give me an old shoe, like the ones you always see someone catch from their first fishing experience. My family fucking loves the holidays and so do I but sometimes they just have weird ideas, this year for example one of us actually had the idea of doing secret santa...in our family...do you realise how shitty it would be if my father drew you for secret santa? Great guy and all but he cannot get into the mood of making gifts AT ALL, he always just buys a gift for my mother and does it in THE single most rushed fashion I've ever seen anyone get a gift ever, it's so perplexing too because I know that this rushed nature runs in our family but I have never been like that when it comes to shopping.

Ah well, I'm just looking forward to spending christmas and new years eve with Alice....What, did you think I was gonna talk about real life? Nah man.

-adios,D.

A wizard

A wizard is never too late nor too early, he shows up exactly when he means to. Also the third Hobbit movie blows, I made up my mind now, it sucks, don't watch it in cinema.

-adios,D.

Vomitting in a circle

I used to love the Theme park series of games as a kid and especially theme park world was great, I remember this big statue in the halloween park that would just go around and round and puke, it had the vibe of a majestic...child that ate too much stuff and then went on the tallest ride it could go on with it's 1.30cm height. Does anyone else remember the Theme games? I never got to play them much, my aunt always played while I watched but it was still a great time! I'm pretty sure we never unlocked the final park, I should get a copy of the game for nostalgia's sake.

-adios,D.

#Iwasgonnawriteanactualtext #butthisjokeisjust #sotempting

nofilter

The everelusive box

Now doors may hold secrets but boxes? Boxes are where it's AT! I remember my first box opening, it was the summer of 69 (drastic dramatization) the box was there and I openened it with my hands.
It was of course empty and like in every boys life  a ghost Monty Hall appeared out of nowhere and laughed at me.
Dude's not even dead yet and he already does shit like that, that's "mad whack yo".

I apologize for that.

-adios, D.

Christmas is comming closer

Time for a stupid rant that has nothing to do with anything!
So, I've realised that my internet is pretty effing bad, not horrible but still pretty bad compared to what it could be and I know why but I don't understand it. Why is it that cellphone contracts make the provider tell you: hey dude how about you get this completely new phone for FREE with better stuff too!It's only fair considering the technology has gotten cheaper so I deserve to make some savings right? The technology for internet has gotten cheaper as well but if you wanna get faster internet from the SAME provider after having the same stuff for yeaaaars you have to go through literal and figurative hell.
Weird.

-adios, D.

I bought a Ps4 and Binding of Isaac Rebirth was free on psn plus

I really have nothing more to say, I technically would have the time for a MUCH more lenghthy text but goddamnit don't keep me away from my ps4 for longer than you have to!

-adios,D.

That little thing you do

So Philip always gives the picture a funny little title that none of you probably see most of the times but it always makes me giggle, THIS time however he done fucked up, he didn't call todays comic pi even though it was the 314'th filename so fuck'em!
He also read a joke into today's comic that's real meta and that I might've subconciously put in there but that was not intended at all, I'll let you guys guess which little thing it is.

-adios,D.

Manfriends

Now that is a horrible way of putting what I'm trying to put here isn't it? Manfriends...sounds horrible... but I was thinking that in our little universe Louis and Greg would probably be the bestest of friends considering that they are most alike.
Anyways, we've been watching a few movies these past few weeks, Interstellar, now Nightcrawler which both were great but I've been thinking about another movie a little more and that is the newest Hunger games movie, because I've been reading the books these past few days, well, listened to their audiobooks to be more precise, and they were NOT as good as I thought they would be and I think that the newest movie and the one thereafter won't be that great...won't say anything more until I've seen them I suppose but the books weren't really that good.

-adios,D.

Between story and casual

It's really hard for me to write sometimes now I know that sounds stupid because I just sit down for half an hour and then come up with some silly stuff but it's genuinely difficult for me NOT to go for a lenghthy storyline sometimes, we see this again in todays comic. While I kind of steer clear of the idea for our next storyline I still scoot along it in a way and I can't ever shake that. I tried really hard not to go to deep and I think I managed.

-adios,D.

Philip is back

How we missed you Philip's drawings.
Yes, how did we miss you? Not like a family member that was overseas for a year now or like internet if it's been out for a week because your provider broke done, not like western society as a whole in a novel that paints the bleakest most terrible post apocalyptic world but rather like modestly useful everyday commodities, we missed you like chocolate chip cookies after a week where mother bought raisin-cookies.
Do i like raisin-cookies? Yes I like it enough but I'm happy that I got chocolate chip back.

So we watched Interstellar on Friday and what can I say? I still want Christopher Nolan's babies but not MUCH more than before, I think Philip's need for Nolan has risen much more than mine.
What I'm basically saying is Philip loved the shit out of Interstellar while I liked it a lot lot but I had slight issues with parts of it, looking back at it though it all seems very insignificant and I now love the movie just as much I think. How does this man not have an oscar yet?
Honestly, why are Nolan's such noncontenders for oscars? They are AMAZING films but while watching them you just KNOW they won't win oscars because they don't have the right subject matter, it's so sad, I honestly believe that ALL of the movies he's made so far are at the top ten of movies over the last 2 decades, dang, all of them are contenders for top 50 movies of all time!

-adios,D.

Non characteristic behaviour

Now we all know that a lot of short stories inbetween the main arcs can't quite be considered canon and todays comic is really prancing on the line. This comic shows me as someone who doesn't beat it and that is NOT what I am like, I beat it a lot alright? Oh and becoming a proteinpowder crazed tool is much more like me than like Philip I guess. But the other thing is much less characteristic!

-adios,D.

Unlimited Ammo Comic the book!

The movie, the game, the boardgame, the musical.
Alright maybe just the book but yes it's a thing that's happening, two books filled with the past few years of comics, editors notes ideas thoughts and the finest goddamn comics we've given you throughout these last years.
It's about 20 bucks for both books and if you wanna have one of these limited edition prints then write us a mail or contact us through the comments or even our Facebook page, we'd be happy to help you get these beautiful beautiful books.
Not sure about shipping yet, we'll plan that stuff out when it comes to it.

-adios,D.

P.S.:Oh yeah, Philip had another wisdom tooth removed so todays and wednesdays comics are gonna be by Louis.

The binding of Isaac: Rebirth

If you've been keeping up with Indiegames then I don't ahve to explain todays comic and if you haven't then...explaining it would not do it justice.
I also just wanna go back to playing Isaac so there's not much time for a lengthy post about how FREAKISHLY AWESOME Rebirth is.
Like,seriously, I haven't found a thing that I objectively dislike about the game yet, sure there's still shitty items that fuck you over but that's part of the charm!

-adios,D.

Halloween

I don't have much of a connection to halloween and neither does Philip.
There isn't much else to say at this point really we both love coming up with crazy ideas for costumes but we never get to wear them because no one invites us to parties or rather noone invites me who know, maybe Philip was invited and didn't tell me about it.

-adios,D.

Nerdgasms

There is a trailer for Avengers age of ultron on the internet and I have watched it a million times and will not stop watching it until the movie is out. I'm also extremely hyped for Interstellar because I'm the biggest Christopher Nolan fanboy.
The goddamn Avengers trailer is sooo good though, James Spader is gonna do a FANTASTIC job of playing Ultron and the songchoice? It took me a bit to realise but they didn't even have to buy the rights for no strings attached because disney owns Marvel! And if that always turns into these fantastic projects and things then more power to you Disney, you have yet to truly dissapoint me!
That was in no way a challenge issued towards Disney, I don't want disney to dissapoint me, their building is highly flammable and I have matchsticks.
Wet matchsticks because it rained a bit recently but matchsticks nontheless!

They have pointy ends and I'm not afraid to throw them!

-adios,D.

Sportsball and Dudebros

I love those two words and yet I hate what they stand for much more than most things in this plane of existance, theirs is a subculture I would never even be able to understand. Sports is not my forte, I just don't enjoy running or jumping or fighting or anything of the sort it weirds me out, I've jogged before, I've ran a few miles here and there and I've had some bicycle tours and my fights and whatnot and all those peoples always say: man running is so much fun, working out is so great" but I can tell you one thing for certain, endorphines are either made up or I don't have them because FUCK working out.
When you lie there in your puddle of sweat and that littlebit of puke that always happens after youve done a workout you truly truly TRULY feel bad, there is no rush of happines going through your bones you just hate yourself for working out, then you hate your self for not working out more, then you watch yourself in the mirror and bounce your belly up and down and think:" this thing is cool what the hell was my problem?" and then you eat a bag of chips.

At least I do those things.

-adios,D.

How do you stop bingewatching?

I just keep finding tv series and honestly it's infuriating! Alright so this isn't about todays comic but screw that, todays comic isn't even about todays comic! I didn't plan something then I rushed the comic out when Philip told me he had plans for today and then when he said that one was too complicated I rushed out an even simpler comic that I'm pretty sure I stole from somewhere or maybe even already did here so yeah bingewatching, I hate it. I can't go to sleep because I wanna watch another episode of the office(yeah never watched it before, I'm a latebloomer on some tv series because they don't air in germany) and I already have three more series I'm planning on watching after I finished the office, university also started so I just sit there idly almost falling asleep during every single class....fuck me...

-adios, D.

P.S.:That fuck me was like a playful goddamnit my life sucks kind of fuck me but if you wanna actually...no? alright...

Trivia

Philip tought I was gonna kill of Greg. I think I've said that before but throughout the last storyline I was really considering it too, we had Alice take a major role in the travel through hell thing and I think it really worked out but at the end of the day Greg is the reason we started the comic and he hits just the right balance of insane and insane that we love so much in our comic and that Alice has not quite reached yet. I used Alice as a clichee in a few comics, you know the woman that bears through the shenanigans but loves her man because he just is the way he is I try not giving her that vibe too much but it sort of slips in from time to time.
I also give Deniz that vibe when he's with Philip though and I think that should count for something.
It shouldn't count for some weird thing where he is my man it's more like he is a child that needs protection, care, and nurturing and those soft plastic things new parents put over every tablecorner so that their kid doesn't run into the table and put a hole in his head.

-adios,D.

Happy Birthday Rorschach Redemption!

Now, since this comic is an homage to Rohrschach Redemption again, a man we know and love and a man with a gajillion fans it will undoubtedly drive traffic to our site so I will use this opportunity to talk about minorities.
I'm just joking, but the point of this whole thing is that the blog Rohrschach Redemption started three years ago and it's rocketshiplike rise to the top has left us all wondering.
It mostly left me wondering about phallic objects.

-adios,D and Happy Birthday Rohrschach Redemption.

P.S.: They always say penis in the end.

50000 Views and making myself a douchebag

I've finally realised what my biggest problem with feminism is...I know we've been over this and people will just hate me more for my opinion but HEAR ME OUT! I've stumbled across the video for Nicki Minaj's song Anaconda recently while zapping through tv, nooo I'm not making this up, I had watched the video online and muted before for the things you're thinking of but the realisation of my problem really came while watching the video a second time while zapping through, so I listen to this masterpiece of awfullness and I realize a horrible horrible truth, a "Golddigger" is considered a much more "empowered" woman than a stay-at-home mom. I thought of the arguments that might be chosen to counter this but honestly, I'm pretty sure my argument is solid, I've argued about how Nicki Minaj is a raving feminist recently and my point was that all she's using is her looks to be famous and of course the other party in the argument said that that may be true but her music itself is just an expression of herself and she's just using her "advantages" to market herself. A Golddigger is doing the same thing, she gets a rich old man because of her looks and lets him pay for everything, that is empowered, that is a woman that uses her talents and skills to get what she wants while a stay-at-home mother is OF COURSE not doing what she wants...my thought process might be a little jumbled but the core point stands.

-adios,D.

So much comic stuff to do so little...alright maybe I got a lot of time

I'm a lazy man and Philip is pretty much just as lazy as I am so making 300 comics is a big goddamn deal alright? We've been doing a BUNCH of side projects as well, I really hope that we can do the whole youtube schtick we've been working on soon but I still have to look for a jingle to play during the opening, I got a few songs already but I haven't decided and much less shown Philip the songs, then there's the other comic we promised like a year ago and the life-sized replica of my penis that I've been moddeling.

-adios,D.

Work was extra hard tonight

I literally got off work 6 minutes before comic deadline but it was my last day so expect longer sundaytexts from now on.Enter more philosophical ramblings here...

Stoner comedy

None of us two ever took any drugs, the worst stuff we've done is caffein...straight into the bloodstream aye aye aye *puts tongue out of mouth and wiggles head*. Not really.
But I very much enjoy writing stuff about drugs, it's such a far ranging thing there's so many different drugs and effects that they can have on you BUT most of them are very dangerous. With the recent uprising of weed in the united states there is also a lot of online content about it and I've been WAAAAY into the content created through this, I watch a podcast called getting doug with high a lot where the comedian doug benson sits in a room with famous people who are also weed consumers and gets high and talks with them, it's worth a watch guys.

-adios,D.

Thought of the day

I overheard a diacussion recently where a former fastfood worker talked to his friends about how they shouldnt eat at most of the fastfood joints, now usually this sorta thing is unremarkable but this guy didnt blame it on poor hygiene or the weird people working there , he said you shouldnt eat at thpse places brcause all the stuff there is prepackaged. Now here's my little thought experiment for you guys, this prepackaged stuff is 100% manmade because we do all that chemistry stuff ourselves, it wasnt gods guft to humanity right? The old testament PROVES god wants us dead and we know that us humans, well, we wanna live forever,  then why is prepackaged stuff worse? 

-adios, D.

References

My favourite movie insult of all times is the one I put into todays comic and you wanna know why? This movie insult delivers such deep rooted hatred in away that none other ever even came close to. It goes straight for your mother than wraps around her like a cushion making you comfortable and happy and then strikes her straight in the heart and you are left there wondering: will my mother be okay after that emotional rollercoaster ride?
God I fucking love Anchorman.
And Anchorman 2.

-adios,D.

Serious Business

Did I ever tell ypu the definition...*takes a deep meaningful breath*

Of HYPE?!

Oh yeah, shit is getting serious and we don't do half measures, which is why, in my opinion at least, this comic is philips best one yet! Written very much as a sort of reveal with few jokea if any (there are some) this comic looks like the culmination of some rather long and arduous weeks.

-adios, D.

The dude abides!

I really don't know where I'm going with this God guy character dude, he's weird but straight laced, he's dumb but he's literally god...I think I have him down more than I had him last sunday but I don't know if I'm going into a direction I like, ah who am I kidding, everything I do is amazing!

-adios,D.

Lebowski

It's Shomer Shabbat - I don't work, I don't drive a car, I don't fucking ride in a car, I don't handle money, I don't turn on the oven, and I sure as shit *don't fucking let them pass*!

There, s a genius hidden deep inside philip. Deep. Deeeeeeep. Very very deeeeep.

And it sleeps A LOT.

- ADIOS, D.

I like the ponytail

It's the little things that make a work of art good and our comic is definetely a work of art shut up! I sometimes don't realise the little things as much as others, I watched True Detective recently for example and liked it enough but when Philip watched it because of my recommendation he OBSESSED with it, he watched it twice now and noticed little details that are well beyond my reach. I picked up on a few little structural things but he just has an eye for details but this time I noticed the little detail he snuck in to give you guys a little sneak peek into the future of this storyline, Petrus' ponytail! It doesn't really spoil anything but it nicely ties in with the thing we are going for but if you really hate this storyline right now (if so, seriously? I mean yeah it had a little lul in the middle but it's getting pretty funny and cool again me thinks) then I have good news for you, not much of it is left!

-adios,D.

#take2 #sorrynotsorry

#rescuetheworld   We've all made our fair share of duckface jokes in real life but I never quite got to make one in the comic so now I thought I'd tackle this incredibly important and meaningful topic since we have a female character in the comic. By the way , have you ever seen a photo of philip? His obsession with having a cute poutyface on photos is now canon in the UAC universe, maybe even irl?

-adios, D.

#Hashtag

I hate photos more than anything, I really really do and I don't mean all of the photos ever taken, it is a BEAUTIFUL form of art, really amazing stuff comes out of it but when I'm on a photo it instantly becomes a horrible abomination. Pictures are worse than videos or voice recordings, you know how your voice sounds off when you hear it recorded? Well my face is not just weird on photos but HORRIBLE and I don't know why, I get the whole:"maybe you're just ugly" idea of course but I don't think that's it I think cameras hate me because of the things I have photographed in my life....yeah...let that sink in.

-adios,D.

Five minutes

I got off from work earlier and thought I'd make it home a little sooner than I did but this is still technicallySunday be still, it's like five minutes because my train boke down on the way.
We watched Guardians of the Galaxy on thursday and it.was.GLORIOUS. That movie kicks serious amounts of ass and I'm probably gonna buy it and the more I thought about it recently, the more I thought that I really wanna watch that movie again which is a feeling I haven't had with many movies much less with action movies.

-adios,D.

There's a lady who's sure

All that glitters is gohold and she's buuuuuuuying a stairway~ to heaheaven. When she gets there she knows, though the stores are all clohosed, with a word she can get what she came here for.
Those are probably a bastardised version of the lyrics and I apologize for that but that's how I always sing it so fuck you.

-adios,D.

How it turns out

While writing a comic you never quite know how it turns out, Philips drawing makes half the charm of the comic, exactly half not more not less, we are equal partners got it?! Today's comic I wasn't too sure of I just really wanted to get the devil involved and wrap things up slightly so I didn't really get a joke in there, Philip had one but I didn't want the devil to be wacky at all, I want him to be a serious guy and a slight threat to us while he is an ally so we came up with this one but with the drawings? I kinda like this comic.

-adios,D.

Writing an old character anew

It's weird to have all of these polished up characters reappear and have them be slightly different in style and character, I must admit I'm having some trouble writing jokes with them recently simply because I wanna give them a new spin but I've been watching much more serious tv programming and thus I tend to over dramatisize them instead of making them lovable hilariously funny goofballs, I'll have to cope I suppose.

-adios,D.

Shitty and awesome

The world at night is a terrible harsh and desolate place at times but I've found that there is always a single solitary beam of light shining through the darkness that is the moons domain. Now before i tell you of this blue ray of hope i must tell you that i don't advocate the terrible industry behind the thing and that my entire life is partly worse simply because of said industry but i'll be damned if mcdonalds burgers don't look almost EXACTLY like advertised at night. 

Anvils instead of pianos

Okay so here's the deal, I was contemplating using an Anvil in today's comic but then I figured that people these days don't actually know what an anvil is do they? To be quite honest I myself didn't find out what anvils were used for until I was like 12, I kept thinking they are just this invention for comedies and comics that is just a heavy hunk of metal to fall on people's heads, turns out they aren't!

-adios,D.

Good Teamwork

Writing only assholes is really hard sometimes because you have to keep track of who hates who and who can hurt who in which scenario but there's one golden rule in this comic, when Philip can get hurt, he WILL get hurt.

-adios,D.

P.S.:*thud*

Stuff about things and more giant catapults

I don't really have much to talk about here, I have a few weeks of vacation ahead of me but no plans of giant proportions. There are things here and there that I have planned together with Philip and without him and things I'd very much like to do but am probably gonna end up not doing but there is one thing I will most certainly do. Hurt Philip. In the comic...of course.

-adios,D.

Tekken & Super Robot Mach Baron

We are hypocrites, all of us and I also thought this was a very quick and sneaky way of speeding up the arc.

- adios, D.

P.S.: Street Fighter was so goddamn hype at this years evo but blazblue? Heartattackinducing.

A little late on this

I'm a spain fan when it comes to the World Cup, and I always was! Before their rise to the top like I don't know, some kind of bird flying upwards I suppose, they were THE underdog, always having reaaaally good players and plays but never quite making it, the eternal second. Then they rose up and I either sounded like a goddamn hipster for saying I used to like them BEFORE they were cool OR I seemed like someone who only liked them because they were winning which I wasn't! AAAAAnyways, I didn't get to watch a single goddamn Spain match and only heard how shitty they played, which was sad.

-adios,D.

From work

I like the scheduling tool on blogger, it's really useful for when I have to work.

-adios,D.

P.S.: Do you feel lucky punk?

Ethan and Puns

I do make him get hurt A LOT.

-adios,D.

P.S.: I proud myself on that fact.

Ill spirited

Alright, so MAYBE making fun of a much much MUCH more succesful comic is kind of weak and dumb but seriously, I personally really think that that comic went downhill fast and hard recently and I used to be a big fan of it! 

I once heard he likes sueing people so I won't use the name any more than necessary and on a sidenote, fuuuuuuuuuuck the weekend that is behind me, it sucked so fucking hard.

-adios,D.

P.S.: The worst thing is that the weekend just before this one was probably one of the best I've ever had so maybe it's just god taking a piss once again.

The amazing Brand0 cameo number 2

I'm not really the right person to talk about today's comic so I won't, I'll talk about another thing that is on everyones mind right now though, yes Philip and I are german and yes I watched most of the world cup, every game I could watch as much as my working schedule allowed.
I don't really care that Germany won the world cup and Philip cares even less so theres that.
I've been writing a few short stories recently, making progress there, and, well...actually there's not much else to tell here for now.

-adios,D.

P.S.: The reason Brand0 is basically Sephiroth.

FML

Big Time. Don't have any time, wouldnt've managed to draw the planned comi.

P:S: Static Flames are intentional, to indicate no actual movement being done. 

-P